I have been away for a couple of weeks to attend to the funeral of my 94 yr old grandmother, and handle some family stuff.  I’m home finally, and was nervous about stepping on the scale.  Much to my RELIEF I didn’t gain weight while I was in the land of cheese and fried stuff. 

I was worried I was going to have a huge setback when I got home.  I’m glad that wasn’t the case. 

I haven’t brought myself to hit up the gym since I’ve been home.  I’m not sure why, to be honest.  Things are still a bit frantic for me, so I’ve honestly felt like I haven’t had time to take even 30 minutes for myself. 

This week is calming down, I’m getting more stuff checked off my to-do list.  Money situation is still very tight, but my hunt for a job is back in full swing since I’ve been home.

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Best I can tell, I didn’t get the job.  I never heard back from them after my interview, and emails to them went unreturned. 

This a huge bummer.  No job means no money, which means bills adding up even more, which means I’m not able to have any sort of social life either. 

I also recently started communicating with a guy from my past, and it’s frustrating bc it doesn’t feel like anything has changed.  Why do I keep going back to the same thing expecting and believing that things will be different?  He said they would be, that he was ready to slow his pace and be in a relationship.  His behavior does not reflect this, however.  How many times should I keep getting my hopes up that things will be different and work out?  Am I so dumb as to keep hoping against hope, just to end up sitting here feeling forgotten and cast aside time after time….  I know what people will tell me to do.  I know how idiotic I sound for doing it over and over again.  I know.  These things are so much easier solved when it’s not you having to deal with it….  I’m a smart girl, why then am I do dumb when it comes to dealing with my own issues?

I’ve been MIA.  I’ll admit it.  I fell off the wagon.  I got off my routine and everything went out the window.

I let myself get distracted by everyone else’s wants and needs, and put myself last. 

Very disappointed in myself.  Now it feels like I have to dig out of this hole I’m in….

After 8 months of unemployment, I have FINALLY landed a job interview for an assistant case manager with a managed healthcare group.  Don’t ask me what exactly that is, just send me good vibes!  OMG I NEED A JOB

Please please please let my interview go well tomorrow

Confession time: I haven’t been eating as well as I should be lately.  Call it laziness or hunger or whatever, but I’ve slipped a little on healthy choices.  The low-glycemic diet is a lot of work, and for the past few days I haven’t felt up to putting all that much effort into things. 

I noticed that in the 3 days or so that I’ve been off track, I’ve felt icky.  Tomorrow I will start back on the good-for-me-diet and go from there. 

My mom bought me a little thing of peanut butter chocolate candy.  Cryptonite!